Sleep Training, NO CIO?

Question

Hi mommas! I am not a believer in sleep training but I’m desperate at this point. My daughter will be 6 months old on 01/13 and she’s EBF. She wakes 4-5 times a night. Daytime naps are only 30-45 minutes unless I’m holding her. I’m exhausted, and have other children to care for. My question is, has anyone successfully sleep trained WITHOUT using CIO? I absolutely refuse to CIO, I would rather die of sleep deprivation, so that is NOT an option for me. But any other methods/tips/tricks would be greatly appreciated! *Side note: yes, she is EBF, I have not introduced food or cereal yet and do not plan to until after her 6mo checkup. She gets PLENTY of calories from breastmilk, and has tripled her birthweight in 5 months. She refuses all pacifiers and bottles. 
TIA!

Answer

Nothing worked for us except CIO. I tried everything. Read many sleep training books. But i didn't even start trying till my boy was 9 months and his doctor said he was ready to be sleeping through the night. He didn't sleep through the night till 18 months when i stopped night nursing.  If you are offering her to nurse during the night, im sure that's what's keeping her from sleeping through.  If you want her to sleep more at night, you have to offer other comforts before nursing such as bouncing, rocking, snuggles.... And give a good amount of time before offering to nurse. She will cry in your arms for nursing but if you feel she's getting enough daytime calories, then she's nursing for comfort, not food.

Answer

Sleep training and CIO are two completely different things. There are plenty sleep training methods that don't involve CIO.

Answer

Sleep "training" is literally just teaching your child healthy sleep habits. So I'll never understand parents who say "I don't believe in sleep training". Essentially, you're saying you don't believe in teaching your child how to sleep....which is a very important and healthy life skill they need. So I hope you see how silly this belief is now that you have a child who refuses to sleep. We taught our daughter healthy sleep habits right from day 1. We didn't just hold her to sleep every time or anything like that. We always had designated sleep spaces (i.e. the crib, pack n play or DockATot). She never ever slept in our bed and I refused to buy swings, bouncers, rockers, etc. Rocking to sleep was always kept to a minimum and we got her used to sleeping with noise right from the start as well. We didn't wake her at night to eat either. We always allowed her to let us know when she was hungry rather than getting her into the habit of waking every x hours. We had her sleeping through the night (9pm to about 6am) by 5 weeks and putting herself to sleep by about 3 months. Naps were always about 2 hours long and she would go to sleep within about 5 minutes of being put down. There were no tears in our process because we were smart and proactive in teaching our daughter healthy habits from day one. It all just became very normal to her and we didn't give her the time to settle into unhealthy habits. The issue you now have is that you have a 6-month-old who has spent 6 months deepening her current habits. So given that you now have to reverse those habits and then create new ones, it's going to be more of a process and chances are, there will be some tears 🤷🏻‍♀️ you missed the opportunity to teach her without tears because you "didn't believe in it". So while it sucks to listen to your child cry, you'll probably just have to get over it in order to break the cycle you're in.

Answer

There's always some crying involved when you're helping a baby learn how to sleep. 
"Taking Cara Babies" would probably be an excellent fit for you though, she encourages a very supportive and hands on approach to sleep training. It's not just leaving your baby to cry it out. I highly recommend her , it's worked miracles for many of my friends and they don't feel like they've abandoned their babies at all.

Answer

Cut out the nightly feeds. She shouldn’t have to feed at night. My daughters four months now and has been sleeping through the night since 2 months. Seriously though, cut the night feeds, comfort her in other ways.

Answer

I read the book The Happy Sleeper & found it really helpful. It’s not cry it out.

Answer

I used the book “The No Cry Sleep Solution.” My son used to wake at least 5 times a night. It helped us get a better rhythm without crying it out. 
Best of luck and I promise you will sleep again someday!!!

Answer

We've had a solid bedtime routine since about 6 weeks. We also have a basic daytime routine so baby knows what happens when. For bedtime we can put him down in the crib awake, read, then switch off the light and leave. He falls asleep usually within 5, sometimes 10 mins. This was done with attending to his every cry in the beginning, and eventually (once he realized we were always there), he stopped crying. 
He still wakes 2-3 times during the night to breastfeed at 6.5 months. Feeding and falling asleep at bedtime are 40 minutes apart so I don't believe that separating that sleep associations helps during night wakings. 
I'm totally with you on not letting our babies cry it out. I think it can be done humanely, you just have to be patient, I'm afraid. 
Most 6 months old aren't sleeping through the night...not sure if that helps you but it helped me.

Answer

Btw, she’s precious!

Answer

Does she breastfeed to sleep? My daughter was the same around that she and I talked to a sleep consultant (who was very against CIO) and she gave me done good tips. I started having her sleep on her crib mattress on the floor, I'd feed her to sleep and then roll away. It took a little while and a lot of baby steps to get out of the door. I'd start by sitting close to her while she slept so if she woke I could put her down quickly and over a few weeks I made it out the door and she actually started having decent naps without me. As for nighttime sleep I would switch off with my husband whenever possible and after a certain time (I believe we landed on 3am) I'd just bring her in our bed with us so we could all get some sleep. That worked for us until about 14 months when she went through a bit of a leap and we were all exhausted so I bought her a double mattress, removed her crib and she slept on the floor. That way I could sleep with her in the night of she woke up.

Sleep Training, NO CIO?

Let's Glow!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey