Crying it out?

Question

I’m 20, I have a 1yr old baby girl. We are were late to the “sleep training game” but we have been trying for months! Routines, bath, book, bed, or active days and routines. Crying out is what I’m always told to let her do, but it’s hard.
Let me know!

Answer

When your baby cries it's for a reason.
Whining is one thing. crying is another. You're basically telling your child "Sorry, mom doesn't care"..

Answer

I did CIO at 13 months and it took 2-3 days and was the best decision I ever made.

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I just commented this on another post, but I really think it depends on your child. I see a ton of posts about how it can be harmful and you should comfort and soothe them. But that 100% doesn't work with my son. He basically hates all soothing objects. If we stay in his room, he either won't lay down or he won't calm down. We could rock for literal hours and as soon as I put him down he'll wake up and cry until he gets back to sleep. I think it's his way of unwinding, if he's anything like his mama and can't shut his brain off.

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I did cry it out at 1. For it was the best choice we could have ever made. It took us 3 nights for it to work. Now over a year later my kiddo is able to go right to sleep on their own.

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A lot of people disagree. I’m not gonna sit there and hold my son for HOURS on end bc he can’t learn how to fall asleep himself which what the DOCTOR told me. He said it’s important for them to learn to tire themselves out. Now that she’s 1 yrs old (unless I read that wrong) it might be a little too late to try it and mgiht actually traumatize her. I started when my sons were little. He fussed bc he wanted cuddled. He didn’t want to lay in his crib. Of course after a minute of fussing I would go rock him and try again. If it didn’t work after ab 5 minutes if this I called it quits and tried the next day. It took a LONG time to do it but eventually they were able to fall asleep and not cry bc they wanted to be held to sleep. Now they’re 2 years old and they sleep in their OWN room in their OWN beds. Of course now if either of my sons wake up crying I will go reassure them that mommy is there and there have been times where both my husband & I have slept in their room with them as they are just having a rough night but ultimately they’re fairly good sleepers & I don’t regret the cry it out method. 🤷🏻‍♀️ They we’re fed changed & taken care of - they were not “neglected” bc I allowed them to fuss for a literal minute 🙄 Majority of women I have seen who have been against this method so strongly end up with kids who either cling to them & don’t want put down, or end up with some serious separation anxiety. 🤷🏻‍♀️

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Children have to learn to self soothe. My son couldn’t and at 14 months we did as per the doctor recommending it. I’m not going to type our whole story but I would have been putting him through a medical procedure if we didn’t try CIO to see what was going on. I did it as a last ditch effort before the procedure. It took 45 mins of checking ever 10 mins the first night and 30 mins of checking the second. It’s been over a year and he sleeps 7:30-7:30 straight through and we put him down to sleep after snuggles and reading books while he’s still awake. He literally was doing it so he’d get attention from us but he was only sleeping a few hours a night. Yes...they do cry for a reason...in my son’s case he was doing it for attention when it wasn’t healthy for him.

Answer

Please don't quote me on this, because I don't remember where I read it, but I believe it's been found that babies who are allowed to "Cry It Out" have been shown to have a higher chance of developing anxiety later in life.

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I dont really have a problem with the CIO method. I've been a nanny before for babies and I've helped raise my youngest brother. Theres a difference between whining/ crying because they dont want to be in their crib and absolutely screaming/ having a full meltdown. When that happens i know it's for real and I sooth them till they calm down and try again. I would in your case since youve started late, try rocking him or cuddling and then lay him down and keep your hand on his back and patting him. When hes half way asleep gently take your hand off his back and wall away. He might fuss at first but give it 5 mins. If he continues go back in and do it again. Eventually I got to the point where I would just cuddle them and then set them into their crib and walk away and they would go to sleep on their own with no fuss. Its gonna take time and effort but eventually he will get there

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It totally depends on the child. I don’t think a little crying is damaging to a child. My first wouldn’t sleep. She is still tough. I tried it all. Nothing worked and I felt guilt. I say it’s fine to try but if your child is crying for two hours or throwing up because they are so upset it’s definitely not for that particular kid.

Answer

I sleep trained my daughter after she hit 1 because I felt it was time, and she was waking up 3 times a night to feed when she didn’t need to ( we bed shared/breastfed throughout infancy and loved it up until 10 months when the feedings increased). I looked up several youtubers who did it and came up with my own plan for a gentle version of CIO. Had a good bedtime routine, would read her a few books, rock with her for about 5 minutes, and then would put her in the crib and tell her goodnight. I made daddy do it the first night because I was SURE she would throw a fit and I couldn’t handle the crying even though we wouldn’t let it go on for long. The plan was to leave her in there and if she cried continuously for 1 minute go back in and soothe her, and then leave. Then increase the increment to 3 minutes, 5, and so on. But she literally fell right to sleep without even fussing or waking up. It probably very much depends on the kiddo, but there are gentle methods instead of just letting them cry for hours on end. Good luck.

Crying it out?

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