How to tell close friend who has been having fertility issues that I'm pregnant?

Question

So there's a group of 4 of us who are all very close friends, and I've just found out that we got pregnant our first month of trying. We're having a girly evening on the 8th of Feb to catch up and have a few drinks(clearly I won't be). I was going to tell them then as I'll be 8 weeks, and we were planning a trip this year so can't plan to fly after June. They know we've been getting ready to try as I got my IUD out, and we've talked about it etc.
I already have my 2 year old son, and Diana is so so good with him. She and her fiance desperately want a baby, and they're currently investigating why it's just not happening. She left one evening from a night out after talking about a suspected miscarriage.
Essentially, I want to try and be as understanding as possible while still enjoying being pregnant with my friends. I know it can be a very sensitive issue, and how lucky we are to have this happen. So if anyone has any tips on how to not hurt her where I can help it? Things not to gush to her about, etc? I love her, and she has always been such a good friend to me I don't want to shove anything in her face without meaning to💛

Answer

Agree with others comments, tell her beforehand. And don’t complain to her about feeling sick or tired or anything like that, she longs to feel those things. I am sure she will be very happy for you but I remember being in her situation and getting upset with people who were moaning about the things that come with pregnancy.

Answer

As someone who has been in this situation tell her before so she can work out her emotions. One thing that was hard for me was when she told me in the car on the way to pick up some other girls for a meeting- I ended up walking out of the meeting crying because she just didn’t care or think about my feelings. Let her process her emotions before so she’s not blindsided and she can enjoy her evening. I’m no longer close with that girl because she NEVER asked how I was dealing with my fertility issues. My husband and I have been trying for over a year and she got pregnant by accident. She constantly complained to me about her pregnancy. Make sure to ask how she’s doing emotionally. Make it a point to let her cry, scream do whatever she needs while she’s dealing with this and in return you can express how you’re doing. Mainly just don’t complain and not ask how she’s doing. I told my ex friend that’s what I needed and she still never got the hint. Just one of the many reasons her and our friend group no longer hang out. Just know it’s a weird situation for her- she’ll be so happy for you but sad for her. It’s a weird situation- you want want someone else has but your own but you’re happy and sad for yourself. Enjoy your pregnancy and you’re an awesome friend for thinking about her!

How to tell close friend who has been having fertility issues that I'm pregnant?

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