1️⃣3️⃣ dpo

I missed my 12 dpo post so I will include it with this one.

12 dpo. Woke up and tested...BFN AGAIN🙄🙄🙄. Drove to SF, was on the road for about 3-4 hours..all the way there I was cramping so i decided to take some acetaminophen for the pain.

Around noon, husband and I went to eat at out favorite pier restaurant. Had delicious clam chowder and water since I was still feeling crampy and at this point I was super bloated😶😳.

Finished having lunch and I was not feeling well at all. I was uncomfortable and my mood had changed at that point.

I took some more pain meds (didn't work). After lunch I had to go #2 but couldn't in a public bathroom 😷. So we decide to come home..drive back the nor 4 hr drive due to traffic and just end the day.

We get home and I test again. Big fat negative again. At this point I am mad, I'm thinking why tf am I feeling like this and why am I not pregnant yet if we have been bd almost every day. Whatever. I'm feeling all types of ways and my husband notices so he decides to get some tequila ( my favorite to go drink). I have been trying to not drink nor take medication or drink energy drinks (which I love) for the sake of a healthy pregnancy. But at this point I didn't care anymore. I needed a drink with my husband to relax.

I cave in and we ended up drinking the whole bottle. 😧. I am feeling relaxed. Even forgot why I was upset in the first place. We ended the day in a good note.

13 dpo.

Woke up, sent the kid to school, put a load of laundry, took my morning test with another suprising BFN and came back to bed. Lol.

My boobs are sore( he did not come near them last night), I am cramping but still no sign of AF.

According to this app I am now 2 days late, but as I have mentioned before, my period is super irregular. I can have a normal 28 day flow or end up having 2-3 menstrual flows per month😲.

I keep going back to when I was pregnant with my fist(11years ago).

That time around I stopped taking the pill mid december and by mid january I was pregnant. Take that I was not nearly as worried or stressed about getting pregnant as I am now. And my 1st is outcome of a previous relationship......I wonder, is it my husband who is having trouble with his swimmers? I know I am fertile myrtle when it comes to this😅.

Ugh, I can't do anything but wait. If we don't conceive in around 9 months we will go get tested.

If you made it this far I thank you for reading my rant/daily life/diary notation. Tomorrow will be another day and it could be THE day we get our bfp. I am not out of the game until AF shows her ugly face.

As always, baby dust to all of you!!