I’m starting to feel like a terrible mom. I feel like I no longer have motivation. I feel lost and numb. In March it will be a year that I have been fired from my job. I have been job hopping trying to find pay and benefits to provide for my child and myself. It’s really been hard. I have been applying and interviewing. I feel like nothing is going my way or my favor because I’m finally getting bad karma for my past which is not fair to my daughter. I gotten so lazy it’s so embarrassing. I never thought I would be this kind of mom. I’m not at my breaking point of giving up but some days I feel like it’s not going to get any better. My child is 3 and her birthday is coming up and it’s sad I don’t care to throw a party. I don’t feel motivated for nothing. I pray for myself I try to get back to me but I just don’t feel motivated. I feel like I’m failing my child. I need help. I’m so embarrassed.