Future MIL

My boyfriend and I have been together for two years. We have a home together and plan on getting married within the next few years. The only problem with our relationship currently is his mother. Mind you we live about 45 minutes away from her, she is in her early 50’s and is more than capable to take care of herself. She treats my boyfriend like he’s a child and acts like she is helpless herself. She will literally call and demand he come clean out or wash her car, or come to air up her tire if it somehow becomes low. She spilt from his father 10+ years ago and is angry at myself and my boyfriend for spending time with his father and new significant other. She has not spoken to him and refuses to for being around his father. She also tells his sisters children how horrible his father is (their grandfather). I guess my question is how should I react to this? I will not have someone pushing around my family or talking down to my future children the way she has hers. I feel it’s wrong for me to just refuse to be around her but when we’re with her it’s all about her and how miserable she is but she chooses to act the way she does.