Just last night I was crying to my husband that I feel our time will never come, we have been TTC for quite some time now. I recently had the wife of one of my husbands friends who is 5 years younger than me with 2 children tell me how "sad and pathetic" my life is because I am over 30, have no children and have recently embarked on a new career path because she landed her dream job at 25, had her first child that same year and 18 months later was pregnant again. She "just can't imagine being as old as [me] and having nothing". Her words hurt me to the absolute core, I try to just live my best life and not compare myself to others but she awoke some of my worst insecurities.

And then today when I was at work I got some intense cramping and this evening I have noticed some very mild spotting. My ovulation day was 6 days ago and I never have spotting between cycles. I'm trying so hard not to get my hopes up that this was implantation symptoms but it is so hard, we have wanted this for so long!

I don't dare even tell my husband, he takes it worse than I do every month when my cycle inevitably comes.