Feeling hopeless and faithless

Sometimes I feel like it will never be my turn. Like god has decided I’m not meant for this. Which leaves me angry and bitter because I feel like I was born for this. So many others have had their chance. So many others who didn’t even want this. When will it be my chance? 13 months and we are no closer than when we first started....

Ugh. This is just a pity post. I’m not looking for solutions or any words of encouragement, especially ones that start with “just relax...” or “keep trying..” you can GTFO with that. Just let me have a pity party. Feel free to join in the misery. 🙄🤬😓