I have a mental illness history. . My baby is 5 weeks old. At night when she wakes up I get so angry that I have to be the food (we breastfeed). When she’s eating I get so “uncomfortable” (not with her mouth to breast but my body does). For a few days I was irritable and was getting mad to do basic care at night. I guess this made her fussy for a few days as she could obviously sense my discomfort. . I’m guilty and heartbroken that I’ve had these thoughts and feelings. Sometimes I give her 5min on each breast when she needs ten (only at night). I feel quilt and I’m scared to even say this stuff. Since I’ve noticed my behavior I’ve obviously been doing better. I’ve had horrible depression in the past so In my head I say I’m fine and this is just one symptom of PPD. Is this just irritability or something more? I don’t really have any other symptoms. Am I only one that’s experienced this?