Anyone who stayed with SO after they cheated?

Question

Hey ladies! So I’m looking for someone who stayed with their SO after one cheated. How long did it take for those haunting feelings to go away, did it bring you closer? Did they change? Did you set up boundaries? I’m looking for people to ask questions to about it working and you guys got through it and are still together! Thanks! Please no hate comments❤️

Answer

Yea, we set up boundaries. Yes, it brought us closer. And yes, the heartbreak was 100x worse bc every time he'd cheat it somehow brought us "closer" so the fall was that much harder. The only thing that changed was the lies, he got better at them, more deceitful. If someone has the heart to cheat, that's who they are as a person. Don't expect them to change bc most likely, they won't. And no, that feeling never goes away. Even if they never cheat again, u will never trust them.

Answer

I'm not the type of person you asked to hear from. 
I have not and would not stay with my husband if he cheated on me. 
Why? 
I am not forgiving enough. I wouldn't be able to forgive and move past it. I wouldn't be able to know he cheated and not feel anger and suspicion every time he would leave the house. And I wouldn't want to live like that. I feel that, for me, it would take away any "good" moments. Regardless of what the reason was, regardless of whether it be a drunken fling, a one night stand or a full on affair. I couldnt do it. Nor would I want to go to counselling POST cheating, because let's be Frank, if both partners were willing to put in that effort, the cheating wouldn't have happened
And you know what? That's ok. It's perfectly fine to know yourself well enough to know what you can and cannot deal with. 
Often theres this expectation that if your partner confesses to cheating that you are in some way morally obligated to try. Because "oh but they told you!" Yeah and? Their guilt became too much and they wanted to dump the weight of their actions on your shoulders so then it's your fault. "She couldnt/wouldn't try to work it out". Which is, frankly, utter bulls**t. 
If you want to stay with you SO. It cannot be because you still love them, it cannot be for the kids, it cannot be for any reason other than you genuinely believe they wouldn't do it again and you can confidently forgive and move forward without suspicions. Very few people can do that, why? Because very few people who cheat, only cheat once.

Answer

I'm so sorry you re dealing with this. Infidelity hurts so badly on so many levels, I will NEVER understand why people do it to one another.
I would personally not stay with someone who has been unfaithful. As hard as it would be to leave and as much as I'd want to believe that it would never happen again, I just wouldn't allow it. I firmly believe that once someone cheats on you they will do it again. 
I wish you the best of luck in whatever you choose to do. ❤

Answer

I stayed after being cheated on in two different relationships and first you might be able to let it go secod you wont ever be able to forget it. My first relationship ended in 2013 and I'm am still finding out about other girls he cheated on me with. I'm up to 11 atm. So no he didn't quit that relationship ended because I had found out about the 3rd girl which was actually the 2nd girl but 3rd I found out about and that I was in the house when that one happened and the only reason I didnt know was because hes friends were covering for him by distracting me. So I realized that I couldn't trust any one and that he couldn't love me because I was right fuckinh there... the second one he was really emotionally abusive he was on drugs so he was always paranoid that I was cheating. Well his paranoia drove him to cheat on me. It was the one and only time and we had a long talk about it and I did alot of crying he knew I hadn't cheated on him and that he messed up well he continued to think I was cheating aka he was still on drugs and paranoid and I would just cry every time because it would just remind me that he's the one that cheated but I'm the one geting yelled at idk what happened but a year later I finally snapped and told him it was over. Every one that I know that has tried to make things work after one cheats has not ended well. But there is all ways an exception. And it will always be in the back of your mind and there will always be somthing that will trigger that hurt as if it just happened... I'm not even with them any more and dont want to be and it still hurts.

Answer

They don't go away it's  always in the deep apart of your mind  ...I forreal regret giving him another chance...in my situation he has shown me he didn't  deserve it...

Answer

Yes with my husband. It ended terribly and I realized nothing was ever real. Now I have issues with trust it sucks. I am always on high alert and it’s a miserable existence. Hope it can be better for you. For some people it works out

Answer

Not me but my partner’s parents cheated on each other twenty years ago. And then again within the past six years he cheated on her. They have four kids and tried to make it work. And their relationship has been just ugly and hateful for so long. They finally just divorced. I have watched them hate each other for 11 years. Everyone relationship is different but obviously these two should have separated after the first offense.

Answer

Message me if you wish.... Or read my old posts lol. I'm like a damn yoyo anymore these days 🤷

Anyone who stayed with SO after they cheated?

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