My MIL is supposed to watch our 2 year old when we go into labor with baby #2 (I’m 38w so literally any day now)

At the beginning of January she informed us that her live in sex buddy (who she doesn’t even claim as a boyfriend or significant other, it’s weird) was diagnosed with shingles. My pregnant self & toddler (who hasn’t been vaccinated since 9m so didn’t get the chicken pox vaccine) stayed away & didn’t even see her to minimize our exposure. Well for months our plan has been to have her come to our house when it’s time for me to go to the birth center so that my son is comfortable in his own environment, I don’t have to pack him up to take him somewhere, & I can come straight home when I am released 4-6 hrs after giving birth. She wants us to drop him off at her house. I was never a fan of this idea (I don’t want to drive 15 minutes out of our way on the way to the birth center while in labor, & don’t want to go anywhere on the way home, especially so they can visit & meet baby, & want my sons to meet in their own home for the first time.) I explained this to her recently & didn’t even bring up the recent infectious germs that were in her home that I don’t want around my hours old newborn.

Well she now is saying it’s not her fault that we “made the ill-advised decision not to vaccinate our children” so she shouldn’t be “disrespected” by us not trusting our newborn in her home. When I discussed it with her yesterday I didn’t even bring up the chicken pox thing, I pointed out the reasons why I, the exhausted & in pain postpartum mother, & the cranky toddler, would do better just being at our house.

Sooo now husband has blown up on his mom for being selfish (literally it’s always about her, this is nothing close to the drama caused with our firstborn labor/delivery situation) & is refusing to speak to her or even tell her when baby is coming. She’ll likely find out via FB as when we try to talk to her further about the situation, she hangs up the phone or refuses to answer. Like any mature 51 year old. 🙄🙄🙄

End rant.