I moved to the US from Europe a few years ago upon meeting my husband. We met in an area that he calls home and has family close by. When I moved, I never really felt like (and I verbalise this often) we’d be here forever. I love to travel and don’t really like the prospect of being stuck in one place forever, especially a place that I have no desire to be in long term. The prospect of having kids with my own family so far away makes me feel so sad, while his parents get to have that experience. It makes me feel resentful and I worry about his parents’ influence in our life. They’re ok people but treat him like he’s still a child, are masters in guilt tripping, and I feel like have been resistant to allowing us to develop our own life and traditions.

We’ve been married for 3 years and my husband is growing increasingly frustrated that we haven’t bought a house yet and haven’t had kids. He’s made it clear he’ll never move to my home country and will leave me if we don’t have kids. For the reasons outlined above, I’ve been really reluctant to put down any roots here. I feel like to make this relationship work, and for it to continue, I’ve had to and will continue to make such huge sacrifices. I don’t want to be here forever, and even if we don’t move to my home country, I don’t want to think that a move elsewhere is out the window in the future.

I sometimes feel like my husband doesn’t respect my desires/opinions and his desires/opinions which I think are so heavily influenced by his Dad especially, are more logical than mine. His mother plays an extremely passive role in her marriage, while his father is extremely domineering, and I see some of their dynamic manifesting in our relationship.

Help!