This is gonna be long cause there’s kinda a back story so sorry I’m advance .// I just seriously need advice .

So I’ve been seeing this guy since mid November ... we were working towards dating because I just got out of a relationship and so did he ,so we were taking it slow ..I didn’t wanna jus jump into anything right away and possibly waste my time or get hurt ... it being my choice to take it slow not his ..he’s liked me for over three years and has been trying to get with me since .

now I still hang out with my ex , he’s a good friend of mine and even though we didn’t work out dating I would like to continue our friendship. The guy I’m seeing knows this . Hes also knows that my ex cheated on me and I don’t want to be with him ... I did sleep with him back in December after a night of drinking and a minor lapse in judgement a friends shitty advice and my mind being all fucked and not knowing what I wanted ...but it made me realize it’s not what I want and yes I’m done with that ...

I told the guy I’m seeing and he “forgave me as long as it didn’t happen again because we weren’t together ”

He is kinda weirded out that we’re friends and still hang out now tho .. so he always made jokes ect .

Last weekend he hung out with HIS ex “apparently” “to see what I liked about it so much and to try to understand”

Wellllll they spent the weekend together .. lmao I didn’t really think anything of it because I don’t sleep with my ex when we hang out and he can stay for days so it never even came to my mind really

and wellll , he has stated many times he’s over her , doesn’t want her , told me how fucked she is ect , that they don’t hang out , he inlywants me and blahblahblah .

Anyyyyways he comes over the Monday , and while he’s out having a smoke

. ——Ommmmg check this timing !!!! ———

DOES HIS EX NOT MESSAGE ME ON FACEBOOK asking me what WE are .

I said I’m not exactly sure right yet , but he’s at my house right now ...

she says “that’s all I needed to know thankyou”

AHAHAHHAHAHA WHAT?

Giiiirl that’s not all I NEED TO KNOW .

So we start talking .

she tells me “they’ve been trying to work it out and been sleeping together since they broke up”

Juuuuust lovely .

So he comes in from a smoke goes to kiss me and I pull away .

He asks what’s wrong and I said nothing .

He asks again so I just say “might of got a text from

Someone “

he says

“what do you mean what’s wrong” the concern in his voice grew .. I was like

“oh nothing , you think you can just fuck me and your ex and neither of us find out ?”

OMG GUYS THE LOOK ON HIS FACE

was petrified he instantly started scrambling and shaking and just being stunned at what I just said .

He scrambled looking for words stuttering a little bit before I said to leave .

basically I refused to talk at that time and said to go so he stormed out . Got in his truck , drove to the end of my driveway . And then comes back in (I’m assuming after he came up with a better excuse imsteadof stuttering and having nothing to say - I mean he was mind blown that I knew)

Saying he didn’t mean to hurt me , yes they slept together but we’re not together and he wasn’t sure we would ever be because I don’t express my emotions enough and I made him feel lonely because I kept flopping on him . ( ihavemental health issues and am going through a med switch as well )

She made him feel wanted , and he wanted to get her back for fucking

Him over so he “played her” and it was stupid and childish but he never thought of it in the scenario of it hurting me “he meant to play her but not me , everythinyeith me with the truth and with her it’s all lies he didn’t mean to hurt me”

Yeah,

likely because I wasn’t supposed to find out . 🙄

Like what if she never messaged me .. how long would that of continued for ...

he says if we were serious then it wouldn’t have happened and he would of told me the second we started dating . I said well that’s dumb cause then you’d lose me right there for our relationship being based off lies and you fucking someone else ...

now I just don’t know .

It’s very hard for me to open up to people

And I build walls instead of letting people in .. so the fact that he did this is really fuckkng with me .

Yes I slept with my ex , ONCE .

He did multiple times , “pretended” to love her for months , and tried to “fix a relationship” he told me was done with but apparently he wasn’t trying to fix it or he would of , because she wanted him .. he was just fucking with her . He only wants me .. and will do anything and wverything to fix this ...

The ex has sent me messages between them

and damn he “fakes” love pretty well and knows what to say .

multiple times my name came up and he said he hasn’t seen me since 2019 and all this next shit .

I really do like the guy , he’s fucking amazing - or was until this ..

And now Idunno if it’s even worth pursuing ...

hestrying really hard to earn my trust back , but how does one even do that ? I do really like him but I’m just petrified of it being a game and not real

He says it is .. but he said that too his ex as well..

I just dunno what to think.

I know for sure him and the ex are done for good now . Like 1649283684847463 million percent . And if he does talk to her she’ll let me know or ask the question to me if we’re still talking .but like how do I know he wont pull that shit eithsomeone else .

How do people gain trust back

How do I get over it ?

Should I get over it ?