Am I crazy ?

I kind of want my little family back... My ex & I haven’t talked in a week since he moved out.. we do have a little one and one on the way. It got bad between us , we always argued , even got physical. One morning we argued to the point of him putting his hands around my neck , strangling me and him pushing me down... but it wasn’t always bad.. I just can’t believe we are at this point . ( filing for custody, child support & a restraining order ) it’s probably no coming back from this. He’s already talking to other girls and probably his ex and I’m just depressed over all of this.. I’m trying to make my mind set on one thing which is no man would do this if he loved you no matter what , arguing or not especially while carrying his child but I can’t help but want us to work it out.