Hello, I am not looking for harshness from anyone. I am also not sure if I posted this under the right group or not. If I am able to I will change the group if someone tells me its wrong one. I realize there are many posts like this and I should have probably just scrolled through those comments but some of the posts looked fake or scripted? to me, like not true is what i mean. , but I think this situation is different i am not sure. My son is 16 he will be 17 on may 15. We are Afghans and we are here legally. My son has been seeing an American girl from his class. I do allow him to date, but i dont allow sex under 18 and sex before marriage in general is haram. Well i was going through my son's things yesterday night because i always take his phone after 8 pm but i remembered he has a samsung galaxy tablet too. It was in the bottom of his drawer and condoms and a girl's pink thong were pushed back. I look at my son in shock and i dont say anything to him i had just called his father. We took his phone, took the door to his room down, and put 2 tracking devices on his phone. Well weeks after that i watch my son life360 and he was driving his car somewhere during lunch break at school then he parks it somewhere and he was still there for a while. I asked his father to drive to the location he was at and he told me our son was just pulling the car out to leave and his girlfriend was inside. So he called him and told him to drive back to school before the lunch break ends and that today is his last day using that car and his last day being in a relationship. My son disobeyed us again and started using his older sister's phone to text this girl and at that point i was having enough. I told my son he can always be returned to Afghanistan to stay with his aunt or go to boarding school. I kept yelling until he was in tears and i guess i made him really upset because he went to sleep outside in his car. Saturday he grabs my hand says mama can we talk and he takes me to the couch to sit down. He tells me that he would like to leave home. I ask him why and he tells me you are right that if im under your house i should follow your rules but i dont like your rules. i told him as long as hes an underage minor he will just have to deal with it. He grabbed my hands & started to beg me and told me that he will prove he can handle himself financially. I asked him if i do not let you go then what would you do then? He told me he will cut me off and since he'll be 18 next year that makes it a short wait until he can actually remove us the way he wants to. I ask him this is all because you are not allowed to have sex and he just shrugs. I apologized to my son but i told him that i can not let him leave and that we should just start over with all of this. So i tell him he can talk to his girlfriend again but no seeing her outside of school until we can trust him again. He looked annoyed but he says okay. He is starting to talk to me a little bit more than he used to but he is still very short when conversing. I don't think I really handled this a wrong way I just feel like teenagers use holding grudges to manipulate their parents into letting them act like adults when they are not adults. I would like for my son to be happy with us again without making it seem like im fine with him having sex or going against allah. I am asking for legitimate help. Please. Are there any muslims on here