I started spotting today at 11 DPO and I just know AF is coming. I’m at work right now literally fighting back tears smiling and pretending everything is okay when in reality I feel so broken. Everyone keeps telling me relax and just “stop trying” so hard, but I don’t have that option! My wife and I are TTC via home insemination so if I don’t track ovulation I literally can’t get pregnant! And for everyone saying to just have sex with a man, why should I have to go against my morals and who I am as a person?? Granted I haven’t been TTC that long, it’s only been four cycles, but every month I don’t get those two pink lines I feel like such a failure. We want a family so bad and it’s my fault we don’t have one yet! It hurts and no one prepares you for how hard this is. I would love to do <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a> and increase our chances, but I here so many stories of women who home inseminate and get pregnant on the first try and I just wonder why I haven’t yet. I don’t have too many people I can talk to this about so I appreciate anyone who took the time to express thoughts with women who can actually understand what I’m going through. All I can now is sit and wait until AF to show Monday so we can try again next cycle. 😖😣💔 I just want to be a mom. I have so much love to give