I would call it symptom spotting, but I know I’m pregnant and I’m pretty much just over analyzing and stressing about each and every symptom. So it’s more like symptom stressing. The nausea will ease up for a few hours or my boobs suddenly don’t feel that sore, and my mind will start racing, wondering if I’m losing another pregnancy. Then other times the nausea gets worse and I’m extra super sensitive to smells, and I should be happy but I’m just anxiously remembering that for now I am pregnant but it could all end at a moments notice.

Our first ultrasound is in a few days and as it gets closer and closer my fear and anxiety just get worse and worse. Things definitely feel different this time around. By this time (7 1/2 weeks) I wasn’t feel sick anymore, at least not like this. I was hitting the gym regularly (right now I can barely leave the house if I don’t absolutely have to). I definitely feel more pregnant than I did last time, but the mind can play tricks on you, right?

I’m so grateful to be pregnant again, but I am so, so scared.