my daughter started at daycare this week and i’ve been struggling- not sure how or if i can cope. my boyfriend and i looked at a lot of daycare centers and picked one that we both liked, was referred by friends in the community, and it even has extra amenities like online camera viewing. with all of that being said- we’re still having issues.

yesterday- there was an issue with one of her feedings not being logged. they were not able to give us a definite answer as to when she had her last bottle or how much she drank just a guess of when she would of been fed based on her mid day bottle.

today- i see on the camera that when they switched rooms (everyday at 5pm they combine the two infants room due to there not being many kids left and the teachers schedules) they took my daughters mattress (w her sheet) out of her crib and put it in another crib that a different kid had been in and laid her down in it. (yes i know that she is still on her sheet but the second infant room is the bigger infants, 6-12mons, and they can put their hands in their mouths and then all over the bars that her sheets just rubbed all over to get put in the crib AND they just had a confirmed case of pink eye in that room)

bottom line is.. i just feel like this daycare is dropping that ball and i dont know how to feel. a part of me is saying that i need to lower my expectations because no daycare is going to be up to my standards considering i want them to give her the one on one attention that i did during my maternity leave and every daycare is going to have her susceptible to germs. another part of me is saying f*ck that- this is my child and i’m not going to settle for less than she deserves.

her dad is also not happy and wants to withdraw her but like i said earlier we looked at a lot of daycares and this was the one that we liked the most! what if we switch her and things get worse??

how are you mamas handling others taking care of your LOs? do i have unrealistic expectations? does this ever get easier? i honestly just feel like the worst mom for having to send her in the first place but i know i need to in order to be able to provide for her 😭😭😭😭