You ask like it has to be one or the other? If it isn’t both you shouldn’t be together at all

If you don’t love them, why date them? If they don’t love you, why date them? It has to be both.

I've done both and they both have pros and cons. If you date someone you love, you can always feel passionate. You are more easily an attentive partner. If you date someone who loves you, you get your way an awful lot without trying and it's kinda nice to know they really do love you. There's never a reason to worry. I do think there's a lot of middle ground for sure, though. So I just date someone I'm happy with who I make happy. We treat each other with a lot of respect, but we also have stuff goin on outside of each other.