So scared this cycle

So not gonna go into detail but just wanted to just talk to someone as I obviously can't consult family here.

Recently married...as in a few months. Had a good relationship 3 years prior and did ttc for the past 4 months. However, this month everything started to fall apart. Seeing another side and wishing I never got married. Not abusive but controlling in some ways.

Now I am super scared that I might get a bfp. So much to think about and counting down days to AF! :(