So my husband and I have always both been stubborn and we both try to work on it but it never fails we always argue. Not only do we constantly argue but it’s like talking to a brick wall and getting no where during it.

So let’s go back for the past year....

My husband turned to be an angry and hateful man. He was never happy about anything. Everyday he came home from work he was always in a bad mood. He downed me for not working and being in nursing school and never helped with our son who was 1 at the time. He constantly bitched about what was not done in the house as simple as the laundry only having one load to do. He told me I was lazy. Yet I have our son all the time when I’m not in school nor studying. He downed me about being a wife and a mother. So I grew to hate myself for not being able to make him happy. But how could you make a man happy who wasn’t happy with himself.

So fast forward to Christmas <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android.eve">Eve</a>.....

Christmas <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android.eve">Eve</a> came around and he came home from work knowing we had to go to my parents for our big family Christmas party. He blows up about dishes being in the sink (literally it was 4 dishes) he proceeds to call me lazy and how this is not what a wife does and then goes in to telling me I’m spoiled. Then he screams he’s not going to the party. So I said okay as I’m trying to just calm the situation down. In my head I’m like what dad doesn’t want to be a part of his sons Christmas where he is actually going to play with the toys and be excited?! I go to the Christmas party with out him and of course my family is mad and asking all the questions of course. So I tell them we are arguing but I’m okay and things just happen. I’m tired of lying for him when he gets mad and doesn’t come to things. So party is over and I get home and he ask what I told them. So I told him I told them the truth and he gets mad and yells at me and goes to bed. Wake up Christmas morning and he still is angry at the world and ruins Christmas by not watching our son open his gifts nor opening any of his that we got him. I tried to defuse the situation by trying not to say anything else or make things worse as he continues to slam the dishes around and proceeds to tell me that I’m not a good wife because

I’m just so lazy by not doing these dishes and keeps going on and on. He then tells me he wants a divorce. This is the 2nd time he’s told me that so I told him okay. A couple days later everything is “normal”....no fighting no anything.

Then comes New Years.....

We decided to go to my sisters and her husbands for a party and our son goes to stay with my mom. Everything was great and fine til we go there and he sulled up and was a complete asshole to everyone and barely said a thing and sat in the couch. By this time I have just had it. I was exhausted of fighting. He ruined Christmas and now he’s ruining New Years (what a great way to start the new year) so get go home and don’t talk. He decides to go hunting that weekend. Thankfully it gave me time to think about things.

He came back and I told him I couldn’t do this anymore. I couldn’t sit here and let our son see us fight constantly and feel like constant shut about myself because he is unhappy with himself. I told him that I wanted to leave and we could split the custody of our son. I just couldn’t take it anymore I was emotionally and mentally drained.

He proceeds to cry and tell me he’s going to change and will change and this and that. I believe him and tell him I’ll give him a chance to prove it. He has changed as I’m not getting mad all the time like he was and he’s doing better about helping with our son. I just can’t face the fact that he’s truly changes. Like how do you just change at the flip of the switch? Also I guess I’m still hateful toward him for how he treated me for so long. He made me feel guilty for wanting to split up our family but I wanted to do what’s best for my son and myself. I didn’t want our son to grow up thinking that’s okay to treat a woman like that because it’s not. He knows I’m still angry with him and he just don’t understand why I can’t forgive him. I’m so torn and have no idea what to do. I don’t know rather to stay and wait it out to see or just leave. A part of me wants to stay because I do love this man but another part wants to leave because I think he will go back to how he was and yes I know I’m not perfect and I have my own flaws but still. . I’m just torn...... and mentally and emotionally drained...

UPDATE:

I filed for divorce in March and we got divorced in April. He was such a narcissist. If you don’t know what that is then I’d say look it up and never ever date one. I feel much better knowing I can do better for me and my son. The stress of having to please someone so unhappy was lifted off of me. Also during the time I filed he met a woman and was seeing her while still sleeping with me and living in my house. I found this out after our divorce was final. Now he has a new girlfriend who has met our son and everything. All I know is I’m happy with myself right now and am doing me finally.