Stay at home mom depression 😢💔

I've been a stay at home mom for 3 years now. I have a 3 year old and a 6 mouth old. I've been feeling depressed as of late. I do the same thing over and over and over again. Everyday is nothing new. I don't have friends. I only really talk to my mom, sister and s.o. I live in leggings and t-shirts because I rarely leave the house. I want to work just to get out for a bit but with one car and no trust in daycare workers. I'm home for now..but I'm starting to lose my mind. My toddler is always bored and I try to find him things to do. Like I said we're stuck at home a lot. I'm always yelling. That's all I do. Just scream at him to stop making a mess, stop dropping food, stop jumping on the furniture. Then my 6 month starts crying any time I put him down. I can't shower, eat, piss, literally anything. I feel like locking myself in the bathroom just to get away for a few minutes. I feel like I'm so close to having a nervous breakdown. Any day now. My s.o works full time and when he does get home I'm still with the kids. It's never ending. I just feel so done with motherhood already and it just begun. I feel awful saying I'm over being a mom because I love my kids more than anything, but I'm so frustrated and exhausted. My s.o and I agreed I can start working when my baby is a year. I told him I have to. Even though he prefers me home. I can't anymore. He talks about having a third and even thought makes me cringe. I feel awful just saying this but I'm at my wit's end. Someone please tell me I'm not alone.