Would you say you partner helps you with house jobs?

Question

My bf of 5 years hardly helps at all with anything around the house even when I ask him over and over again. 
He’s like a kid won’t tidy up after himself won’t wash his clothes or put them in the laundry basket won’t make a meal for himself etc 
His excuse is ‘ he works’ 
It’s draining we have a one year old and a four year old and while I’m rushed off my feat he’s doing nothing :/

Answer

Having a job isn’t an excuse for being an slob. It sounds like he is lazy and has been able to be for a long time.

Answer

I’m in the same situation. My fiancé has a highly stressful job that’s 100% commission so I get that he works. However, he’s at work by 7:30 and off by 2. I literally do everything and I’m given the same excuse that he works and pay the bills however I feel like “why do I have to put your dirty clothes in the hamper off of the floor and why do I have to sift through your clothes to find the ones that are dirty?” Why can’t you hang up your suit jacket on the hook instead or leaving it on the couch or somewhere else?” Why do you leave your dirty dishes, cups and snack wrappers on you nightstand for days and maybe weeks? I wonder if he thinks I’m a maid. I’ve tried to leave it there and let it pile up method, but it doesn’t work. Then he gets and attitude when I ask him to bring his dirty things downstairs to the kitchen.” I really don’t understand!!!! I do everything in the house from grocery shopping to cooking, cleaning, laundry, making lunches, ironing clothes, and taking care of our 3 kids not to mention the 2 yr old is a handful and always need something. It’s always go ask mommy for it, if see if mommy can help you. It’s so annoying, like I’m not the only parent in the house. I don’t think he understands how much being a SAHM takes out of you. He says he job takes a lot out of him and mental work is much harder than physical work..... umm I guess he doesn’t know my job is mental, physical and emotional!!!!

Answer

My hubby works 6 days a week and still helps around the house and with the kids.

Answer

My husband doesn't expect me to do it all on my own and knows keeping the house clean is a full family job. Once a week he spends a good half of it cleaning (which makes a huge dent because he's a much faster cleaner than me. Probably because I get overwhelmed easily and it slows down the process)

Answer

My husband and I have had discussions about this. He does best when I write him to do lists. With his ADHD, he gets distracted by other things. It's frustrating. He knows it bothers me and I don't understand why he can't just see things need to get done and do them.

Answer

My ex was like this, very very frustrating!!! We both worked and I had kids that weren't his and yet I was the one who cooked and clean as well as paid most of the Bill's. He treated it like it was 3 against 1 and I should pay majority of the grocery bill and electric bill. Needless to say we fought 24/7 he played the I work physically you do mental work it's not the same bs excuses. We broke it off and I was prepared to think all guys were like that until I found my current significant other who seriously helps alot, cleans before I get home. He hates laundry but is willing to always do the dishes. We share the work load and pick up each others load when one of us had a bad day or sick. I am so thankful to have found him.

Answer

My husband works full time shift work and I'm a Sahm. I do the majority because I feel like it's my job as a Sahm. But I did have to teach him a few basics. His mum babies him until we got married (he was 27lol). At the beginning of our marriage he was like your bf. Now he knows to put his laundry in the right places or he'll either have dirty laundry in his wardrobe or clean laundry between dirty laundry in the laundry basket lol I'm ruthless!! He is a better cook than me..so he does cook whenever he's off. And he does the dishes and hangs laundry every now and then lol
If I ask him to do something, he'll do it.

Answer

Like others say, having a job is no excuse. You have a job too and that is taking care of your kids but you still do things around the house. Certain things should be done, like putting dirty clothes in the laundry pail, how hard could that be?! My partner and I argue a lot about dinner. Since he works 8am-6pm and gets upset when he comes home with no dinner. On weekends or doesnt matter just the days he works. O do get his point but sometimes I'm just too tired to get my daughter (13 months) dressed and go get groceries and then stand in the kitchen to cook a meal. I hate cooking. But when I do I get lots of compliments from him. So in a way there should be certain things a sahm can/should do like laundry, making a meal and maybe a quick clean here n there. But I also feel like it depends how old your kids are, how many and their temperament.

Answer

Why wouldn’t he? He lives there and makes the mess too no?

Answer

Thanks for everyone’s comments I really am struggling with what to do because he’s not bothered about mess and I’ve tried the whole not doing anything to see if he’d eventually do it himself and he doesn’t he’s also not bothered if his clothes are washed or not so i don’t know what to do ? 
Any ideas ?

Would you say you partner helps you with house jobs?

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