Had my third son yesterday. And everything went very very well except my BP kept dropping due to my epidural. But he came fast and he’s very healthy. 9lbs 2oz. 22 inches long. He was born at 11:53am. I was induced at 39 weeks 5 days.

I’ve been through the postpartum period twice before this. My oldest is almost 4. My middle is almost 2 and even though this is my third baby. Being postpartum is still so fucking hard. I’m emotional af and crying because I miss my babies at home waiting for me. I am blessed to have my mom there with them so I know they are safe and well taken care of and they love her to death but I still miss them like crazy. I just got off the phone with my mom and talked to my oldest who said he missed me and my youngest just kept saying “mama” but he wasn’t crying so that’s good. But I could barely keep myself from crying long enough to get off the phone so they wouldn’t know. My husband had to leave to go home and feed our chickens but should be back any minute. I’m holding my new baby and just crying cause I miss his brothers. This is the first time I’ve been away from my middle son since he was born. And the only time I’ve been away from my oldest was while I was at the hospital having my middle son. This is just so hard. My whole body hurts. My back aches so bad I can barely stand straight. My hips and pelvis ache. My stitches burn. My nipples ache. I’m exhausted. And I just got off the phone with my dad who I don’t have the greatest relationship with. He offered to get me a gift and asked to come visit soon. Which is nice but he doesn’t usually follow through so I’m not getting my hopes up. I just wanted to try to get all this out so I can stop crying hopefully. If you read this thank you. Here’s a picture of my newest baby boy Colt Matthew and my oldest and middle son August and Barrett