TW.......Domestic Violence

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I feel like I’m going crazy, because I can’t post on my social media about it. So many of my friends and my husbands friends (who are on my social media) don’t know the truth about him.

I needed to vent somewhere because I just can’t take bottling it up.

I haven’t seen my husband for almost 2 weeks. He completely lost it and assaulted me (in front of our 1 year old) he choked me, and pulled chunks of my hair out (I have bald spots). He punched me in the forehead repeatedly. I had gash marks on my face from his wedding ring bc he was wearing it while he punched me. He broke my glasses. He took my phone and went through it and called me every horrible name in the book.

We had been living on the road (no house) in our car and he forced me to leave the state with him. I told him I didn’t want to and he threatened I would never see my baby again if I didn’t go with him. I was scared for my life if I didn’t do what he asked. By a miracle I was able to call my dad and he called the sheriff in the town we were stopped in. And the officers came to check on us. Only because of that was I able to say what happened and they helped me get my stuff and my baby and go to a shelter. They wouldn’t arrest my husband bc they said he had commit no crimes in the state.... (only in the other state)

I’ve been safe now with family and have filed everything against him...

He messaged me and twisted everything. Projecting all of the fucked up shit on me and saying I was the one who assaulted him? Is this a mental disorder to where he really believes that cuz he so disconnected with reality he projects all the back shit he did on me and makes it me in his head?

He been fleeing. Updating his pics with pictures in planes and of tropic islands. Who fucking runs away if they aren’t guilty?

My heart is so hurt cuz I really loved this joke of a man. I thought he was someone else I could trust. I wanted so badly for a life to work with him I must of ignored so many bad signs.

The worst part is I can’t shut those feelings off. Even now I miss him. I miss the good parts of him anyway. Fucking it feels so horrible to be completely heartbroken and have no idea how to get through it. I’m just trying to do the right things for me and my baby but it’s so hard because I want to call him so bad and scream at him why?!?! Why did you fucking do this to me?! But I know I can’t because he’s a master manipulator and any contact he will just use to try and project the guilt onto me.

Fuck it’s so hard

I just want the nightmare to be over but I know there’s a huge battle ahead. He ain’t gonna ever own up or try and make it right. He won’t come to any court hearings for custody or divorce. He will just keep running and tell the next woman who shows him interest, how I was the crazy ex wife who assaulted him and took his kid away from him and ignored him. Ugh it’s such fucking bullshit. I wish I had saw the signs and I hope the next woman does before he gets her too