I’ve been TTC with my partner for about a year now. Lately I’ve really gotten so hung up in the idea of trying and trying and trying that I forgot that my partner and my selves happiness way fading when it came to sex. Lately he was not wanting to & I thought “how fucking selfish of him does he not want this what’s wrong with him” then the self doubt if my own looks came to mind.

We tried hard last month.. got a false positive and had our hopes up until I got my period. I’m not gonna lie I said I was done I gave up. But I prayed to god and my faith boosted up.

Anyways back to the main point of this story. Lastnight my partner and I not even thinking about conceiving had sex. It was amazing and I didn’t think anything different, tonight laying in bed he says to me “I really enjoyed lastnight. We really felt like we were in love like we used to feel. We made love like we used to I really liked it” i thought nothing of it until right now that my own selfish self was so caught up in the idea of conceiving that I was just getting up on and doing the business and that was it there was no love just sex for me. I now know why he didn’t want to for a long time or would seem “selfish” because he wasn’t being selfish I was. I was so hung up on the idea that there was no love with TTC. Please ladies when you think he’s being selfish and not wanting it just think that although there’s this idea that men don’t care and they don’t want love and affection it’s not true. They are human like us & just like us want to be made that they are loved and wanted.

He opened my eyes, I woke him up and told him I loved him and I’m sorry for the times I blamed him and called him names when it was my own selfish ass. All he wanted was to feel like he was love and wanted.

Anyone with similar story’s I’d love to hear in the comments.

Remember GOD IS ALWAYS GOOD. ❤️🌈