I can't do this EDIT**

I'm getting tired of rasing my siblings. I'm getting tired of raising my mom. My mom acts like a teenager. My mom will leave the house without telling me and won't pick up her phone. I've had to cancel plans because of it. Last night she went out with friends. While we have a stay at home order. She didn't even tell me she was leaving. Then we had a tornado warning and I got worried because there was wrecks and she wouldn't pick up her phone. We had plans with each other we was supposed to watch a movie and color. Now she's gone again and I've I need to get some essential items from the store (I'm in charge of grocery and household items making list and such) I wanted to go to the store before I cook dinner because after I cook dinner I got to get the young ones bathes and to bed. This is so stressful and exausting I just want to be a teenager. I want to be the one that leaves and doesn't answer the phone. I want to be the one hanging out with my friends. I want to be the one that stays out until 2 in the morning and come home to my mom waiting for me on the porch. But no. I have to stay home with her children. Im the one calling her scared to death something happened. I'm the one sitting on the porch till 2am worrying about where she could be. I'm tired of it. I go to a Christian homeschool so I am literally at home with her kids 24/7 while she does whatever she wants. This has been going on for years. I don't know how much longer I can handle it. I won't be an adult for another 3 years and can't get emancipated for another 2 years.

EDIT**

I can't call CPS. Me and my siblings all have different dads. The youngest dad is on his birth certificate and technically still has legal rights and we was very abusive. He raped and beat us all. My mom never made a police report on it. I don't want my brother going through that he has mental disabilities I don't think he'll survive... My other brother if they can find his dad and his dad wants him he'd go to them and I don't have a legal father so I have no idea who would take me.