Vent post.

I try so hard to stay strong and not slip back into depression. Every other day I find myself having a minor breakdown and I start to feel like I’m drowning. No, I don’t think about death or self harming, which I once did when I lost both my parents at 13-14 but I mainly just think about escaping. It hurts, i try to go and smile all day everyday but when my baby nurses ask me how I’m doing it just remind me of how much I’m drowning. I hate watching my baby go through what he has been going through but what hurts most is when I was 12/13 I watched my mother go through so much and eventually I saw her take her last breath! I don’t know how else to express what I feel but through anger. I’m just trying my best to fight depression, that Im starting to feel like I’m hurting myself and pushing others away everyday. I feel so selfish, I’m trying to be happy but fighting demons that I haven’t completely left behind me added on to the new ones starting to feel like a tough battle.

He is my light on my drake days