Abusive? Not? Just “Restraining You”
This is long sorry.
So my husband is an avid gamer. He plays as much as he can whenever he can. Well he got off the computer and came and sat down with us in the living room. So I got up and was like okay I want to go do some of my online lectures for an hour and then I’ll start cooking dinner. Let me tell you this man flipped shit. This would mean that he would have to watch our son for an hour and a Half and not get to play his game during. He rages into the computer room and is berating me and telling me I can’t use the computer because he wants to play his game (he literally just played 2 games back to back for over an hour, league of legends). I told him he had already played and I needed to do homework. I set up all my powerpoints and lectures and start listening to my professor and he rips the headphones out of the computer and says “well I don’t want you using my headphones.” And then I I start playing it out loud and he hits the power button on the tower. At this point I’m livid because what if I had work that I hadn’t saved yet pulled up?? So I got pissed and was like oh we’re acting like children now huh? I unplugged the power cord and tried to leave with it because he does not get to say that his gaming is more important that my degree (I know it was childish for me to do that). But I try to leave the room with it and he blocks the door. I try to shimmy passed him and he gets pissed. He wraps his arms around my chest and squeezes really tight and pushes me into the wall. I’m kicking off of the wall trying to get him to let me go because this is hurting and his grip was only getting tighter. Finally he gets me back into the room. And I have to take a minute because I literally couldn’t breathe. He can tell what he did and let me through the door. I went out side and threw the cord in the car. We had a huge fight after because he says that he was only restraining me and that nothing he did was wrong, period. He then went on to say a bunch of mean things to me calling me a whore and saying I make myself out to be easy and single.!?! Tf!?! I’ve been married to this guy for 4 years. Together for 6. I tried to leave. But he started crying and I ended up staying. He’s at work now and I’m at home with our son. I just don’t know what to do. Anytime I try to leave he somehow makes me stay. He already said that he won’t change. So counseling would do nothing. I’m just so confused.
To add, after the fight I was adamant about leaving. And he was like well “you can TRY to file a police report but they’re not going to do anything because I didn’t do anything to you. I am not an abuser and you can’t make me out to be one just because you want a reason to leave me with me being the bad guy and you being the good guy. I refuse to labeled as an abuser when I’m not one.” And he kept saying this is YOUR choice to leave YOUR choosing this, not me.
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