Is This Acceptable?

I am a very neat person and my husband is a pretty messy person. He has been home every other week because of COVID-19 and on those weeks the house is a complete wreck. He doesn’t vacuum, dust, clean the kitchen, or clean the bathrooms. The sink is full of dirty dishes he didn’t even rinse. All the laundry baskets are full. Everyone’s clutter is scattered all over the house. The trash cans are full. The yard looks awful. The only things that get taken care of are the things I take care of myself.

Today he is at his dads helping him build a deck and he has been texting me a little and I have been texting back but I normally don’t respond for about 20 minutes. He is upset that I’m not responding quickly but the reason I’m not is because I’m cleaning our house, doing schoolwork with a 6 year old, taking care of a 2 year old, and taking care of 2 dogs. I just want to.scream at him because he is upset with me for being too busy to text him. I wouldn’t be so dang busy if he put in more effort around the house.

My love language is acts of service and he knows that. We have discussed it many times but he still isn’t willing to put in the effort around the house. His love language is physical touch and I hate being touched a lot but I put up with it and touch him a lot because I want to love him in his language. I really wish he would do the same for me. I don’t expect him to be as neat as I am but I really would love for him to meet me halfway. I have relaxed a little on being a neat freak for his sake but he isn’t doing more for my sake.

I have been busting my butt all day cleaning and I’m honestly pretty annoyed about it. Especially because he took over the household for 2 days this week because I didn’t feel good and he didn’t do a dang thing but then wants to tell me and anyone who will listen how easy it is to do what I do everyday. It was only easy because he did about 25% of what I do every single day. I honestly just feel like it isn’t acceptable for him to be this way. 😒