We’ve been together for 2 years. We met in church. He was in a 7 year relationship before we met. His family grew to love his ex and have their own relationship with her. They go to the same church, they invite her to all family functions even over for Holidays. He hasn’t talked to her or been involved with her but he said he can’t tell his family who to socialize with.

Before quarantine began he asked me to marry him. We were going to elope but his family discouraged him, telling him to wait, it’s too soon etc. I’ve been there for him and his family tremendously this past year, emotionally, financially etc. they don’t know how much of the money he’s given them that’s come from me supporting him when his work was slow. He comes from a street family that teaches him to not trust anyone. He has severe trust issues but we’ve been going to God about it.

He cries to me about struggling to trust me, saying he has no reason not to and that God showed him that I was sent to him as a blessing he can trust. But he said he gets thoughts of insecurity that causes fear and anxiety because he’s never seen a trustworthy relationship in his family or past. He’s only seen betrayal. I believe he’s faithful. He’s giving and we talk of a great life together and a future together often. He says he doesn’t want to lose me behind his fears and that he’s desperately praying that God helps him get better.

But as soon as I feel we are making progress he’ll get a call from a family member and obviously something they discussed made him feel fear all over again and he begins to doubt me and pull away for a few hours emotionally. He starts asking me lots of questions like he doubts my faithfulness. But then comes off of it and apologizes and says he doesn’t know why he feeds into the thoughts but that in the moment it’s a real fear to him.

I love him so much. I don’t know what to do.