So about a week ago my husbands grandparnts came to visit my mother in law and they asked to see my boys. Which i have no problem with. So i took them over and as usual they were more then happy to see them.

But sinse about mid april my oldest has been telling everyone mommy is having a baby girl. Which im not currently pregnant but we are trying and he knows it. He loves being a big brother.

So he blurts out that mommy has a baby in her tummy and they all go quite stop smiling and go oh i hope not. Like it made me feel like they think im a crappy mother. Now this isnt anything new as my one sister in law just had a baby girl in December and at our annual family picnic last summer, they all said that we do not need anymore kids.

But yet they were fine with my brother in law wanting another baby after the one they were pregnant with at the time. Which to me is ridiculously suprising as him and his baby mama live with her parents and pay no bills (I know this as my mother works with my brother in laws girlfriends mother and she tells her everything). And have 2 children now as she had the baby in December.

But me and my husband have our own home (which is paid fully paid for) are financially stable and depend on no one to help us.

I honestly feel people hate me and look down on me i know there are things going around in my husband's family about me that arent true. And they judge me off those rumors. Me and my hubby are high school sweethearts we have been together forever and married for the last 8 years. So i just dont get it.

We have been through a lot we struggle with infertility so our boys are a very big blessing to us.

Sorry for this being so long. I just feel so defeated and that im this horrible mom and person. My husband just blows it off but they are his family so its easy for him to say oh well who cares but it really does hurt me to the point i dont feel good about myself anymore and that maybe i don't deserve my boys or to have any other children. And it breaks me 😔