Preganacy Body Image Issues

Hi everyone. I'm posting because I keep hoping I'm not the only one out there who feels this way. I'm only 6 and half weeks along, and I keep getting the notification in this app to start my timelapse photos.

I would really love to do that kind of thing; I see all these beautiful women taking pictures of their bump, feeling gorgeous watching their little person grow in their amazing bodies. I love it. And then I stand in front of the mirror...and cry.

After having my first child, 7 years ago, I have been fighting for years now to lose the weight. I have never been "skinny" (160 in high school), but carry my weight well. Over the last year and a half, I have dropped from 240, to 200. Now, having to change my diet to a better one for the baby, I'm fluctuating between 200 and 210.

I don't feel like a "bump" is what I will see. All I see is "fat". I know it's stupid, and after a miscarriage in Oct of last year, I know this is a blessing. But I just can't see past the "just being fat". Maybe it's just the hormones talking, but I wish I felt "beautiful" like all these other mommies I have seen. 😭