Uncomfortable

I need opinions here. My best of about 16+ years has recently become very buddy buddy with a guy that I’ve been seeing, I am uncomfortable and I don’t know what to do about it.

So my best friend and I have been friends for a very long time and I’ve never once had any reason not to trust her. We share a home together (we’ve been in our home about five years now). However, back in February I started seeing someone, things have moved very fast and are going great... However, when he comes over she is very friendly with him and it’s begun to make me uncomfortable. For example, asking him to pick her up things from the store when he’s been over and went out for things, having conversations with him that I feel excluded from, and just generally something is not sitting right with me. Some of the things she has said when he hasn’t been around have also added to it... i.e. she likes his car, his music, etc. She also mentioned that it was one thing to “like someone’s boyfriend” and another to act on it in a conversation. I just feel... uncomfortable and I haven’t felt this way previously with any past boyfriends. I was married and we all lived together at one point previously and my husband had told me once or twice she had made him slightly uncomfortable.

Anyway...I said something to my boyfriend today and he cried. I had had enough when he sat in the kitchen and had a half hour conversation with her while I was upstairs. He was very worried that he was going to ruin things without meaning to. I don’t think he meant anything by his actions on his side of things. I think he’s a good guy that is agreeable and wants to be liked by my friends, I told him that was important to me when we first started dating. I also haven’t shared with him the things that she’s said to me in private that have made me more concerned.

To say it’s damaged the friendship from my perspective is an understatement. I’ve already started to think about selling the house and getting my own place... I just don’t know what to do in the meantime. I do not like feeling this way. It has me feeling very sad and down on myself, because on one hand I feel “jealous” and I don’t like it. On the other hand I feel very angry with her because we have been friends for 16+ years and she must know she’s making me uncomfortable.

Just feel very poorly at the moment.