11 years relationship on a quest

Hello!

I've been on a relationship for 11 years. My first and only boyfriend. I'm 28.

This relationship has been a rollercoaster and we've been through a lot, like me living abroad for a while.

My partner hadn't worked for over a year and I have the feel that he's not putting to much effort into finding one, and this for me it's unhealthy as I wanted to start living together and create something of our own (not ready for kids though). In April we had a big fight and I kind of took a little break from him, as I didn't want to be with someone that doesn't want to do anything with his life, but he kept on calling and we made up. But I don't feel the same anymore. Moreover I've been daily talking in messenger with someone I've never met, we don't flirt or anything, he's very kind as to help me daily with something I'm currently studying for my master's (it's a language). I started developing feelings all of a sudden for this person, I don't know what it is, I don't think it's love, but I can't consider it nothing. I'm daily waiting for his messages and can't wait to talk to him. He's rather private and his Facebook it's rarely updated, finally yesterday I got a newer picture of him. And boom I feel even worse. He's older than me, 41.

I'm don't know what to do and what I am doing. I don't really think this is cheating, even though if my partner would discover this would be mad as he is very jealous. But why am I feeling this way toward this other person? Am I crazy? To have feeling for someone I've never met? This has never happened to me. Lately I have had feelings if having wasted my time with my only relationship, but then I think that with all the crappy men around I was lucky.

Can I hear your opinions? Has this happened to you? What should I do? My heart is in pain.

Ps. I work full time on permanent contract, so I'm not a lazy one that pretends the man does everything, sorry but I needed to specify this.