He still doesn’t get it...a year later.

About a year ago, my husband took a trip to Europe with his brother. He told me he was going to Florida. I begged him not to go, because our daughter was 4 months old at the time. He called me controlling, and I finally caved. We agreed on a date he would come back. I ended up finding out, when I saw purchases on the credit card for places in Amsterdam. I lost my shit. It was bad. I found out all the lies. His mom had even covered for him. His trip was never he agreed upon length. I felt so betrayed. I was a new mom, at home, by myself. Not getting any sleep. Struggling with no support, while he gallivanted all over Europe.

We argued a lot, but moved past it. He agreed it was the wrong choice, but blamed it on me being controlling.

Fast forward to last night. We were arguing because he is helping his friend move Saturday. A friend who was exposed to someone who was exposed to COVID19. This friend also has a wife who works in a hospital. We just found out I am pregnant again, and I am uncomfortable with him going. He said he had to go because his friendship with his best friend depended on it essentially. He agreed to wear a mask. I accused him at one point of not putting us first. Then he said it... “Maybe only once did I not put you guys first, and our daughter wasn’t even born yet.”

Really?! She was 4 months old. He doesn’t remember that because he wasn’t the one struggling to parent her alone while he vacationed. It made me sad because it showed how much he truly didn’t empathize with how that situation made me feel and the pain and stress it caused. And obviously his memory is crap, which is maybe why he doesn’t think the trip was “a big deal”.

I know I am being hormonal and grouchy, but it just blew my mind.

Edit: I know I posted this, therefore asking for thoughts. I really just needed to vent. You don’t know the entirety of my relationship, so please don’t try to judge it. Respect the decisions I have made, and just allow me to feel frustrated. Thank you. ❤️