I’m struggling with insecurities in my relationship. I haven’t always felt this way but it’s grown and cropped up. I was cheated on multiple times in my last relationship so I have major trust issues but that didn’t stop me from my new relationship, where I trust him completely and don’t usually acknowledge my fears.

But lately, it’s been different. My boyfriend loves to tell me about all the ladies of his past that he found attractive or was in love with, most of which are still close to him. He told me multiple times how was so in love with his best friend and she rejected him and it went on and then they kissed but nothing came of it, and he never says he’s not in love with her anymore, just that she started dating someone else and it hurt. He still makes me feel like it’d different with her. He took her facetime call with her immediately after we had sex and i had to try and crawl out of my bed and go around him to try and get my clothes on, I felt so uncomfortable. Or how much support he gives her, types her paragraphs of appreciation and support but when I’m sa he just goes quiet and leaves me alone.

Then, yesterday. A bunch of people were invited over. Including a girl that caused trouble in his last relationship. He went over to her house and she cuddled up to him when he was in a relationship, and that made him rethink his situation before. I do not trust this girl whatsoever. She came into the house and was sitting on the couch with her bra and her boobs hanging out. I thought it was incredibly disrespectful. When we first started dating, she swiped up on his snapchat and asked him if he needed any condoms. And started shit talking his ex. (Something I don’t even do out of respect for her.) She told him she hopes I’m not as jealous as his last one. She’s very flirtatious and it left such a bad taste in my mouth. He told me about how they hang out and she made him question his relationship and they still talk every day and has yet to say he isn’t still interested in her.

I told him that I’ve felt so incredibly lonely in our relationship and he told me that he knows he has to put more effort into it and that my love just scares him because I do so much for him. At this point when he gives all of his attention to other women, I don’t see any attention left over for me because he ends up playing his games at night with his guys. I don’t know if I should speak up and ask for reassurance or not.

Please no mean words.