Left while pregnant for money and an easier life
Last night I got a text from a friend telling me that my unborn baby’s father is dating a woman twice my age (I’m 22). I called him and it’s ALL TRUE! I’ve been crying all night and all today. We broke up a couple of months ago but he was still calling and checking on me, meeting me for doctors appointments and we just had our baby shower and he never once mentioned he was seeing anyone.
When I tell him about the text and asked him if it was true, he said “you broke up with me and it’s none of your business what I do or don’t do”. I remind him that just yesterday he texted me that he loves the baby and me. He says he didn’t mean “in love” and that he loves me as the mother of his child.
How is it that I feel this much hate and pain but still want to be with him? I can’t trust him and I don’t think he’s going to be there for me and his son like he insists he still will be. I just want to completely separate myself and my feelings from him. At this point, I doubt I’ll even call him when I go into labor since he’s so caught up with this woman, he probably wouldn’t even show up. I just can’t respect a guy that will leave his child for comfortable living. This woman has money.
Now everything has changed. I REFUSE to give my child his last name. This is something we had discussed and I agreed to it only because we were going to be married! We were supposed to be a family! Why should I give my child his last name then my name would then be different than my child’s? When I tell him this, he’s got the nerve to get mad, talking about we already decided blah blah blah. No, I get to name my child what I want to. I’m done being kind to this punk.
I should’ve known something was going on. He wasn’t answering my calls like he’d normally do, so I was suspicious anyway. In the past when we were on a break and he was up to something, I could always tell. I told him a couple of weeks ago to be sure to wear condoms with whoever the female was that he was effing. He texts back “you’re funny guy”, like he didn’t know what I was talking about. Even then he didn’t say anything about this woman and apparently they started seeing each other a few days after we broke up! 🤬🤬🤬
All this time I been thinking we would work things out and be a family but now this comes up. We’ve been through so much; we were together since high school and I never would’ve thought he’d do something like this to me. I just hope he doesn’t think he’s gonna be playing house with my baby and his old lady. My baby will not leave my house so if he wants to spend time with him, he can come over here. He tells me that he wants to pick up my baby for visitation and take him to “his” house. First off it’s not HIS house; it’s her house. Second, I don’t know her and I don’t want her around my child. So I told him no, especially when the baby is newborn.
I also called her and asked her what was going on. She says they’ve been dating a couple of months and that he told her I had broken up with him. I asked her how she could date my bf when he’s young enough to be her son and knowing we are a couple and having a baby. I told her she should look at him and see a child. Instead of answering me, she tells me that she’s been a single mom and she understands how hard that is, so whyyyy would she be so willing to break up my family if she knows how hard it is to be a single mother? She also said that he could leave if he wanted to, so damn if she doesn’t care, why is he even there? I couldn’t even stay on the phone with her I was so irritated. I did wonder if he knew she cared so little about him that she’d say he could just leave. So I called him and asked him how he could leave his family for a woman who would say he could leave if he wanted to. Again he tells me their relationship isn’t my business.
I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. I don’t know whether I’m coming or going. I’m not sure about what to do next. How can I get him to understand that he’s in the wrong? That it’s wrong to walk away from your family without trying to work on things? That it’s wrong to kick your pregnant gf to the curb and not be there for her when she needs you most? What would cause a man to do this? Is their relationship a rebound relationship doomed to fail?