There’s something wrong with me. Like medically wrong. My stomach is a mess and I bruise super easily and I lost 100 pounds. I don’t always feel sick or anything but I def struggle with this everyday. So tell me why I’m scared to death of going to the doctor. I don’t wanna find out anything bad cause I don’t know if I can deal with it. Last tome I went I had to have surgery and that was the scariest thing that’s ever happened to me so far in life. I guess I just have fear from that. I also have a massive phobia of needles. The thought of someone else shoving something small and sharp into my skin freaks me out so bad. Not enough to stop me from getting medical treatment. It’s just hard cause I go in with an anxiety attack already so when it comes time to talk to the doctor or do blood work I freak. I just need some encouragement and stuff cause I’m scared and need to get over this fear if I wanna be happy and healthy. It just sucks so bad.

I also mentioned I lost 100 pounds. I almost don’t want to find out what’s wrong with me to prove to all those people who said she HAS to be sick or she HAS to be doing drugs ir starving herself can be proven wrong ya know. I woudnt be embarrassed and it won’t stop me from getting the medical care I need, it just sucks that no one thought I could do it alone and now yeah I may not have but I wish they didnt have to know that.