Hi all..

I am a 22yo Muslim Arab girl seeing a 23yo non-arab Muslim convert man. We started off as close friends from the age of 12. We were just friends. We lost contact when went to high school and rekindled in our senior years. Our friendship eventually lead to more as we got older. When we thought it was leading to “love” we had to resist and make it halal. He says he will come for me sometime this year because he’s dealing with some personal issues that I know of and I understand that. However my father does not know about him or my relationship. And I’m not sure how he will take it because he is not Arab. I told my mother about him and she frowned upon it mostly because he isn’t Arab. She came off quite racist to me and rude to the guy. She insisted I stop speaking to him and if my father found out, he will flip!! I only told her about him because another Arab family have asked my parents for my hand in marriage for their son. They came over and my first impression of the son and his family was not good. It didn’t quite sit well with me and I’m hesitant to speak to the son. My parents are pressuring me to speak to him saying all these good things about him and his family but I keep refusing and saying NO because my heart doesn’t feel content. I feel like I’m being forced because they want a reason to why I’m saying no. I’m saying no because I want to marry the guy I’m ‘dating’. I feel so comfortable with him and feel like I’m at home and safe when I speak to him. I cannot see myself with anyone but him and he is the same. He is a good guy, a good Muslim, I just feel bad because when I tell him there are guys asking to marry me, he gets upset because he cannot offer me that right now. I do believe he is coming for me, he is my best friend and inshAllah this is our fate together.

I am having a hard time telling my father about him because how am I meant to say I want him without giving the secret relationship away. They can’t refuse him on the basis of race.

My parents are constantly encouraging me to give the other guy a chance and to speak to him even though I told them I’m not comfortable..

Please help me out, or let me know if you have been in similar circumstances..

thankyou xx