Warning! It was really rough, so I don’t want to stress any moms to be with this experience.

I was due the 29th & had an induction scheduled for the 4th. I woke up at 3 am on the fourth to a big cramp & thought it was a pee cramp and went to the bathroom and lost a little plug and went back to bed. I remember coming in and out of sleep with the cramps but I ignored them. Around 4:30 I couldn’t sleep through them and realized they were contractions, I didn’t get too excited yet, I had contractions from about 35 weeks on. I woke my hubby up about 15 mins later because I started having to really breathe through the pain, so we tried to sleep some more but he said it’s time to go because they were getting worse. We headed to the hospital and I was monitored by L&D and they said I was still only 1 Cm dilated and that I have to go home, but they gave me a morphine shot in my hip. We went home and I laid down and just struggled through the pain for a good 6 hours or so, I started to really grunt and breathe heavy, I went pee again and a whole bunch of bloody plug came out. I tried to get into the shower, it hurt too bad, tried again and made it successfully, then a really bad contraction hit, I was on all fours and just wheezed and couldn’t catch my breath. My hubby said enough is enough and we got me dressed and raced to the hospital, ofc we got stuck behind a cop on the way down. At this point I was screaming holding onto the handle in the car just buckling in pain. We got back to the hospital & they made me register in triage which took forever and then I was wheeled upstairs to Maternity because I could not walk. I get upstairs just wimpering, the whole place was packed full of chicks getting NSTs so here I am getting wheeled in screaming, can’t walk and they’re all chilling getting monitored 😅 I got onto the bed in between contractions & was just squirming and semi-yelling in pain and they finally checked me and I was 4 cms so they admitted me. They gave me a gown, the pain was unbearable so my hubby pushed into my tailbone while I contracted (holy fuck what a life saver, I’m serious, it’s so good.) and he helped dress me while I bent over the bed wheezing in pain. I got wheeled into my room and I fell from the chair when I was walking to the bed because of the pain, at this point I’m full screaming through contractions, begging for the epidural. They brought gas but I hate feeling loopy so I just powered through the contractions. Epidural guy comes and I’m just digging my head into my hubby, trying not to move as they got it set up. After it was done it was sweet relief after about 5-10 mins. I laid back and could finally catch my breath. After that I napped a few times and progressed really well. The nurse checked me again, 6 Cms & my water is bulging, they asked if I wanted them to break it, I said no. Checked again a few hours later & I had progressed to a 8 and just as she was finishing the check my water popped. She told me that he pooped in me, I asked what do we do next, I was scared asf. She said we wait till I dilate to a 10. I napped again, we checked again and I’m 10, time to start pushing. Pushing was the least painful part of my experience. I pushed for 2 hours straight, rotating positions, taking 30 breaks in between as we waited for each contraction. They eventually gave up on me, he wasn’t moving like they were hoping, the nurse blamed it on me and said my pushes weren’t good enough. They brought in the Ob and he started the vacuum. That was traumatic, I cried at the sight of it, I felt all the pressure and pain, he vacuumed me rather aggressively for 20 mins and then decided to cut me. Watching him hold up the scissors and then reach down was horrific, my hubby cradled my head while he did it. He put the vacuum in and tried for about 5 mins again, we’d get so close and then he’d lose suction and fall backwards, ripping the vacuum out. He said enough is enough, a nurse grabbed my arm and started to take blood and I instantly panicked and begged not to go in for a c section, but they prepped me and my hubby and pulled my nose ring and started to wheel me down. I sobbed the whole way, I was terrified & was going into hour 20 ish of labour. They brought me into the OR and pushed the freezing stuff into my epidural line and it burned so badly, I just remember looking around begging for something to help with my stress, begged for someone to help me. My legs felt like they were full of hot coals. The nurse looked up and asked a question, then said we should’ve been in 15 mins ago and then the panic really set in. I was wheeled back, they strapped me to the table and lifted blankets so I wouldn’t see. I laid there and just sobbed and then I felt the first cut, the meds weren’t all the way effective, I instantly passed out. My hubby held my hand and I would tug it when I felt the pressure and pain, so he got them to gas me at the highest I could take it. I was gassed until they pulled my son out, he was limp and wasn’t breathing. My hubby started to sob and freak out as they put my baby on a table and started doing compressions, then they pulled him out of the room to sit by himself for 5 or so mins while they pumped my baby’s stomach. Finally they wheeled my son to my hubby and he broke down. He thought we would both be dead. They finished me up, during the surgery my bladder was cut, so they placed a catheter while I was in. My hubby begged to be there when I woke up, but they sent him to our room with our baby to wait. I woke up surrounded by nurses begging to see my hubby and my son, they wheeled me upstairs, I don’t remember that, then they put my son on me and started grabbing and squeezing my boobs trying to get him to latch. I couldn’t see, my eyes would burn when I opened them and I just sobbed because I couldn’t see my baby’s face. Labour started at 3 am on the 4th and my baby was born at 1:49 am on the 5th. I stayed in the hospital for about 2 days after, I was so incredibly swollen down there and a nurse said that she’s not even sure if I’ll ever go back to normal. I sobbed some more. My baby came out with a very swollen head, his head was so bruised and had cuts from the vacuum. He also got jaundice, so he laid under the lights for a full 24 hours. It was hard to see him in there alone. They told me if I didn’t walk out of the hospital by myself, I wasn’t leaving. I could barely make it to the shower, now I have to make it all the way out of the hospital and to the car. I got up and persisted though, grabbing a IV cart to stabilize myself as I walked. I made it to the elevator, just shaking and wobbling and then blood started to run down my legs. I begged for the chair and the nurse told me if I don’t walk then I’m staying. I persisted, finally my mom mentioned “even with an episiotomy and c section she has to walk?” The nurse said “she didn’t have an episiotomy.” My mom was taken back and told her I absolutely did and the nurse said “oh, I guess I’ll get you a chair then” and they wheeled me to the car. I’m now out of the hospital and home, hoping to get my catheter out today, 6 days post surgery. I get a blood thinner shot in my stomach every day. My hubby does it. I take antibiotics, through the IV for 2 days and now orally for a week. I also take iron because of the blood loss. It was awful, such a horrific experience and my hubby and I still sob occasionally over it, but our boy is alive and healthy. I will more than likely be reaching out for ppd & ptsd. This was my first child, I’m only 19 & I had such a healthy pregnancy.

Leo Jeremy

8 pounds 12 OZ, 20 Inches long