It’s really hitting me hard...

Me and my husband have been trying to have another baby for the past 8yrs!!! My first baby I didn’t know I was was pregnant until I was like 2 months along, that was 9yrs ago. Last year in July I thought I had gotten pregnant since I took a couple of first response and had gotten a faint line but it was just a faulty test, I was crushed cause I had gotten my hopes up😔. Well a year had passed and I haven’t gotten my period for a year so I was sent to my Obgyn and she confirmed that I had PCOS and that I was not ovulating on my own. So she put me on provera and 2.5mg femera. It didn’t work the first round I didn’t ovulate since my progesterone 21 day test came back 0.53. I know it was only the first round but I was so crushed cause I thought I did ovulate and I have all these pregnancy symptoms but all I get is BFN. But today hit me really hard I just broke down and started crying cause it hurts so much to know that I can’t convince on my own and that I feel like I’m a failure...I know I’m not the only one but I just needed to get this off my chest because I really don’t have no one to talk to about this with out someone saying oh well at least you have a kid already and know what it’s like to be a mother or it will happen your still young!!! Why does it have to hurt so much!!!