What is daddy issues? Vent. Advice.

Question

I have issues with my dad. He was never there for me ever. I would go years without contact he never even ask how are you or anything. I stopped texting him because he would just answer plain and leave me on seen.
I remember when I was 13 or something and asked him to buy me a nail polish when we spend the day together and he said he didn't have money ok good but then the same day later he says wait and he goes to the store and starts looking for a TV to buy for his apartment with his new wife.
He took me shopping for 2-3 times before and it was because I insisted on it and that was it but it wasn't extra expensive or anything I just wanted to spend time with him Because he lives in another city. Next time we see i ask for some oreo cookies at the store and he says he doesn't Have money for the box AGAIN and then I ask please and he said ugh okay but we have to get a box as well for his gf's child (not his).
When I said to him I'm taking the drivers exam and he didn't ask or called to see how it went.
I don't want money I just wanted simple things like t-shirt, nail polish.. He says I have no money for that and then goes and redecorated his apartment even made a room for his gf child!!!! And he threw out my bed out of his apartment.. His gf and her kid stole my t-shirt when I visited them!!! 
Now he has a kid with her and I feel like that kid is getting all the attention that I never got from him. I never got a father figure in my life and it makes me have very high expectations from men. I used to be attracted to old men but not to the point to actually be with them. I just wanted their attention but not sexual relationship. Thanks for reading.

Answer

This sounds like my exact life. Except for the fact my grandpa (his dad) took my dads spot and stepped up. I’m a grown adult now and my grandpa passed away. My dad lives with his wife and “his kids” and he still has nothing to do with me or my children. I’ve learned to just deal with it. I’m not mad at him, but I just have nothing to do with him. I consider it his loss. I can name so many things that he done to me as a child that sounds like the exact same thing your dad has done to you.

Answer

I grew up with dad issues:he wouldn’t pay for anything, he was verbally abusive, smoke, did drugs, terrible father figure. All that made me have high expectations for when I was ready to settle down, but I have learned that you can’t change the past. What I went through made me want to be a better person, wife, friend, and soon to be mother. I’m so sorry you are going through this. Learn from all of what you’re going through right now and make sure you rise above it!

Answer

Daddy issues is when you basically had a deadbeat dad growing up or nit one at all and you look for what your dad was “supposed to be” in a future partner, to fill that void that your father left. Whether they are older men, whether they look or resemble your father, whether you have that relationship with your partner where he’s more of an authoritative figure, and more dominant in the relationship and it’s also a sexual preference, daddy/daughter connection, There are entire categories of pornography dedicated to daddy/step daughter, daddy/daughter, they’re all paid actors obviously, not actually related. My father died when I was four, I had a father figure from 6 to 16, that I got attached to and called daddy, because he was the only daddy I ever knew, my mom’s boyfriend. She tolerated him because I got attached to him, the minute he was gone, when I was 16, I was looking for love in all the wrong places trying to fill that void. Went from man to man to man. A guy that I’m dating, actually resembles my dad, And that was the draw initially and he knew that, it was a little weird in the beginning to say to a guy hey you remind me of my dad, I was kind of a kick to the ego, but it’s the truth, he looks a lot like my dad, and reminds me of him. And another guy am dating, he’s much older than me in, I’m 42, he’s 57, he doesn’t look his age. And that relationship is more of him being a dominant personality, and it’s more like a friends with benefits I guess I’ve known him 20 years, he’s a great father to his kids, and you can see the love and affection that he shows to them, I kind of feel that from him, not that I want him to adopt me or anything like that, but you feel that same care and affection and it fills the void that you didn’t have as a child, that’s what daddy issues is. Filling the abandonment that you felt as a child￼ With someone who’s either older or gives you the daddy vibe, or as a father himself, you feel that way. Cares for like a father would for his child. Adored and affection and loved.

Answer

My dad complains about paying for my school, doctor things, housing, food, clothes and other stuff. He has since he started buying my stepmom everything she wants. He puts her siblings through school but complains if I have an injury and need a doctor. He builds a house for them and complains about my university bills. He no longer pays for the majority of those things but it’s been this way for years. It makes me mad but still, it’s his money and he can do what he wants. My father is generous perhaps but also a hypocrite in insane ways.

Answer

Does his wife work? Could it be that she paying for all those things u mentioned? Does he pay child support or are u now older?