Am I in the wrong??

Hey ladies!! I posted a while back and I'm sure the ones reading this haven't seen that one lol. But basically my last rant was about how my husband who is a truck driver added this gas station girl to his fb, he says nothing is going on between them that they just talk about the kids. I've told him how I find it suspicious and how I felt and all he could do was say nothing is going on blah blah. But then he went on to add her on Instagram. Back in February he had an "emotional" affair on me. I didn't find out until March when the girl messaged me. The day I found out and all that next day he kept denying it and was saying she was lying lmao. He didn't come clean until 3 days later.

Anyways, back the recent events. The gas station girl came up on the people I may know on Facebook so of course I had to creep and there he was. Liking all her selfies. Which he does to other girls often and he knows I personally find it disrespectful unless its one of his female friends i actually know of.

So today we got into huge argument because I brought it up. And he constantly turns the table on me. And how I treat him. Yes I might not be the best wife since the cheating thing. But I am scared. And he also hasn't done anything to help me get over it or feel better. And his actions now are making it even worse. So of course he's pulling how I'm not allowing him to have friends and blah blah which is not the case at all. I feel this whole situation is fishy as can be!! He never puts me first, its always him. Any time we argue its always turned on to what I'm doing wrong. When he cheated on me I had messaged my oldest niece because she's more like sister to me since we basically grew up together (my sister had her young) and he got mad about that. But I literally have no one else to talk to. I don't want to talk to my sisters because they have perfect happy marriages with husband's who actually love the crap out of them.

I just never thought I'd be so broken in my marriage. But yet here I am. And I have no friends to vent to or just get advice from. I'm literally just drowning in emotions.