Nov. 11, 2020 I was 14 weeks along and I had spotting. I was hopeful that everything was going to be ok but with having previous miscarriages(@7 weeks and 10.5weeks, and a chemical) I was also prepared for the worst. My dr brought me in that same day for an ultrasound to check everything out and there was no heartbeat. It was a missed miscarriage, baby measured 11 weeks 2 days. My baby’s heart stopped beating the same night I last heard it. The dr suggested for me to take misoprostol since it had already been awhile. After 4 hrs I finally had a gush of blood come out and soon after that my water broke. I was so scared for this miscarriage to happen because I knew my baby was bigger than my previous miscarriages. I asked my husband to get in the shower with me so I could hug him because I didn’t want to see anything come out not even the blood. My husband would reach out under my to catch whatever came out. I told my husband I felt like I needed to push a little and I did and then my baby came out. I saw my husband pick my baby up and I lost it seeing my baby’s body so lifeless. It was the hardest thing ever seeing my baby’s little fingers with nails already, the eyes were open, nostrils, and ears. I found out my baby’s gender right there in my bathroom and it was a little boy💙😞

My dr finally suggested to get blood tests done to see if I have a blood clotting disorder and to do karotyping for me. I only got my blood work back for blood clotting and so far everything came back normal except for my anticardiolipin, that was a low positive, so I have to repeat it in February.

I did have my thyroid levels checked back in April due to routine blood work and they came back a little high at 5.78 the first time but came back normal at 4.01 when they repeated them and therefore said I didn’t have thyroid issues.

When I was 10 weeks pregnant they changed my nurse practitioner and she wanted to recheck my thyroid levels and they came back abnormal at 6.480 and they diagnosed me with subclinical hypothyroidism. I asked the nurse that called me about my results if there was any chance it could have effected my pregnancy so far and she said no bc it was only mild hypothyroidism. And after finally seeing my endocrinologist she put me on levothyroxine at what would have been 12 weeks.

I really thought this was going to be my rainbow baby. And even though I still have more testing to do it’s hard not to feel discouraged. I feel like everything will turn out to be normal and I’m scared to try again without knowing the cause of my miscarriages😞