Being fair towards family members

Beebee

My LO's aunt isn't interested in being one. My 17 month old never received a hug or kiss, she tells her she's the mother of Paula - her cousin - instead of "I'm your aunt" I find the interaction rather cold and bizarre. Though, a couple of her friends kids, she takes them and cuddles or kisses them.

X-mas is around the corner and my husband said we should get his niece something. I'm fine with that. But then I told him if ours doesn't get anything like last year, maybe we shouldn't bother because they might feel uncomfortable and obligated. (She told me last year, we shouldn't have given a gift, now they have to get something too) hence the obligation.

He said, he's the uncle and he's doing it for the niece and not the parents. Which I completely agree to a certain extent. Eventually, ours might feel left out when she gets older and it's not fair.

If they don't want anything to do with us somehow I don't see why we always have to be the givers.

I might be wrong that's why I'd like to see some opinions/advice on this matter