Holiday Hosting...

I already think I know the answer here BUT my mother in law stopped today to visit (we have a newborn and a 3 year old). My husband’s gram had her when she was in HS so his gram is only 70. His mom is in her early 50s and lives alone. When we first married, they didn’t like that my family ate at 1 as they ate at 12 (we would stay from 11-1 with them). It was only the two of them, my husband and I, and his pap along with his brother and sister in law. His gram babysits my son and all of them live within 5 mins of us. My family gets together with all my aunts and uncles, cousins, etc. Most are coming from 2 hours away and they see my kids at Christmas, Easter, and Thanksgiving. Anyway, his mom said today she needed to talk to me because his gram is tired of hosting all the holidays. We have two small children and I already host Christmas with my family as we bought my grandparents house AND I host every holiday (usually the day after the holiday) with my husband’s dad’s side. Christmas Id be hosting three times! The other holidays I’d have to be up early with the kids cooking to have everyone there for 12 OR hope my family would be together early in the day and then have to leave to go home to cook. I think this is unfair to ask me at this point in our lives. I point blank said no to Christmas. I want to enjoy the morning with my babies and not be rushing and distracted cooking a big meal for everyone. I want to be able to see my family who I only see a few times a year rather than preparing a big meal for people we see every week. The problem is how his family can be and I just don’t want to deal with the drama of saying no 😔 I will, though, because I have zero desire to do this. In fact, one Thanksgiving I felt bad when we ate at 1 with my family so I offered and DID host his family (this was before kids) and did it for 5:00. Every person who came had already eaten together at his grams at 12 so I never did it again. I mentioned it to his mom and she said they wanted the leftovers. Huh?!!! Also, his mom is young enough there is zero reason she can’t but says it’s because her house is too small. There are only 7 of us and two small children and my brother in law and sister in law didn’t even come to Thanksgiving this year...so she’s cooking for sometimes only 5 (not including my little ones). She can easily help his gram at her house bigger house if this is truly and issue. We are the ONLY family they see for holidays so we come at 12 and my family usually now gets together around 4 (when my gran passed it changed from our usually 1:00) so when we leave they are done for the day at like 3 while we have a whole other family to see. Not to mention, we all help clear the table and do dishes! I didn’t this year as I’d just come home from a weeklong stay in the hospital after having my baby on 11/15 and developing HELLP syndrome. I was really sick. I’m going to tell his gram when we see her next and text his mom and tell her I don’t want to take on that responsibility. Am I wrong for this?

Edited to Add: This isn’t about the pandemic. This is about upcoming years. We aren’t seeing my family (except my parents and brother who live beside us) for Christmas and we haven’t seen any of my extended family since last Christmas because of it. My in-laws watch my son while we work and when I was in the hospital so they are around us anyway..all the time...which is partially why them asking me to host holidays for them bugs me...It’s time away from my family who I rarely see.