I feel bad saying that, but it’s true. He’s only 25 and he’s NEVER happy. I know it’s probably depression, but with him being in the military and transitioning out he doesn’t want to admit that to the doctors here. For what reason, idk. I guess the stigma. He doesn’t want to go to a therapist either bc he’s busy trying to get out but that’s bullshit. He has time, he’s just making excuses because he’s afraid. I’ve had depression, anxiety, and PTSD but at least I’ve gone to therapy and I’m on medication and have been for over a year now. It’s hard for me to even bond with my husband because he’s just absent. Yes we spend time together but it’s not quality time. We’re just coexisting together. We have 2 young kids and he leaves their care up to me and then once I put them to bed he demands more from me that I’m unwilling to give because if I did I’d be getting neglected. He doesn’t fill up my cup but he expects his to stay filled at all times. It’s impossible for me who is one person to do that to 3 people plus a dog. I just can’t. I’m so deprived from a break i don’t know who I am anymore. Nothing is making me happy anymore too and I can’t live this way. We split during the summer for 3 months so he had a 3 month break from all 3 of us but he spent it staying busy with friends and work at all times or drinking. I wish I had a 3 month break bc I desperately need it. I have no more to give to anyone that some days I wish I didn’t exist. I wish I could just run away or die because then maybe I’d get a break. I love my family but it shouldn’t be this hard.