What should I do ???

Question

My boyfriend is going to his friends’ house to help them move furniture. Now this friend is the same age as my bf (27) and he is now married and his wife is pregnant. 
I met them a few years ago when they were just engaged. They were only together for 2 years when they got engaged. 
When he told me he was going over to their house, I started thinking about how they are married and pregnant. And me and my bf have been together for 5 years!!! And we don’t even live together yet. 
I talked to him about it and said that I have really strong feelings about marriage and having a baby. And I want those things soon. And he said that we could have kids without getting married. And I said yes but I want to get married too! 
I’m just worried I’m wasting time. He doesn’t want to put a ring on my finger. We don’t even live together. Any advice ?? 
He is 27 and I’m 25.

Answer

Personally, I would never have kids with someone that wouldn’t marry me first. Kids are a far more serious, long-term (lifetime) commitment than even marriage because they depend on you. I told my husband he had “x” long to marry me or I’d walk. We were married right before that x got hit 😂. As for them getting married in a shelter time, don’t worry about it. Grass is greener and all. They haven’t even hit the 3 year itch mark, whereas you have bypassed it and survived. Early marriage does not equate to success.

Answer

I personally wouldn’t have a baby with someone who can’t commit to marrying me. 
I also wouldn’t have a baby till I’m living where I’m gonna have the baby at. Maybe y’all should move in with each other first and see how that goes for a couple months. Don’t rush to have a baby simply because you want one.

Answer

Be very blunt and ask for a timeline. When I started dating my husband he knew marriage and kids were a must. If he didn’t want that then don’t waste my time. After a year of dating we talked about marriage and I told him I wasn’t going to wait forever. I was open with my expectations and told him that within the next year or two I wanted to be at least engaged. I told him I loved him but I wasnt going to just wait around.
First I would talk about moving in together and getting engaged. If he doesn’t see that in his future and it’s a must for you then you need to consider what your willing to give up to be with him, or leave him and figure out the next steps without him.

Answer

You are wasting your time. You want marriage clearly he does not. There's an old saying why should he buy the cow when he got the milk for free. That equals to why should he marry you in any form when you gave him a kid. You might as well stop wasting your time take back your life and go find somebody who wants a marriage then kids.if somebody wants kids but not marriage then they're sure as hell not ready for kids. also a guy usually knows around 3 years if he's ready to get married or not. If he hasn't asked you to marry him or even you know go further in the relationship it just tells you that you're not meant to be with each other.stop wasting your time before you realize you're eight years down the road and everything you ever wanted you threw away just because he didn't want it.you need to make sure the things you want in life are put on top of a list because those are the most important things and finding somebody who has the same way you want is better than finding somebody who's halfway there you deserve to be married and have kids not owe a child and nothing else to go with.you don't want to be the girlfriend for the rest of your life or the baby mama you want to be the wife.

Answer

From the sounds of it you should move on. The odds ate you are just wasting your time at this point. Marriage and family are either not important to hom, or he still is unsure of hos feelings for you. It sucks when you really love a person, but you need to think about what you really want in life. Pressuring him onto it at this point likely will not work out in the long run.

Answer

In some relationships having kids before marriage works for them.. but that's because they feel committed. 
But it's been 5 years.. no moving in? No plans to? 
Have u talked about it?
Don't settle.

Answer

Is there a reason he doesn't want to move in or get engaged?? If there is an actual reason I might be more ok but if it is just "don't want to or not ready" I would be having a serious talk with them. I know people who were together a decade before getting engaged and are amazingly happy so to me the years/time don't matter as much as why he hesitates when you are ready and have told him what you want. If marriage and kids are an important thing you guys need to both be honest with each other but sounds like he doesn't wanna make that commitment yet...so 100% don't have kids with him. Divorce can be messy and hard but co-parenting is one of the hardest things people have to do. If he isn't ready to share a bedroom I wouldn't wanna share a child with him...just my opinion though.

Answer

For me it would be a waste of time if we can’t get on the same page and want the same things for our future. Marriage and children are important to you and that’s 100% valid. He may not be the one and that’s okay because you can’t force him to want to marry you and you shouldn’t give up have your wants and dreams to please him either

What should I do ???

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