My whole has been without my dad since I was 2. He inconsistently visited me until I was maybe 5 and they the visit became more spread out. After the age of 13 I haven’t physically seen him since and now I’m 21. My grandma (his mother) passed away this past November and he’s made a reappearance, which I only felt like was the case because somebody told him that I had my son in June. Now that he’s back I just have a hard time not being god awful honest with him and telling him how awful he’s made me feel about myself and my ability to maintain healthy relationships. I don’t believe him when he says he’s coming back to our city and I don’t think his intentions are genuine. It very triggering when he says he loves me and he’s gonna be in my life because I’m brought back to a time when I starved myself and always blamed myself for him not sticking around. I don’t know